Is it possible to remove the cross after baptism. Pectoral cross - when to wear and when to remove. Is it possible to remove the cross after the baptism of the baby

Peace be with you, dear visitors of the Orthodox website "Family and Faith"!

Many of us remember the time when the Soviet atheistic regime forbade wearing a pectoral cross. But, that time has passed.

Now it has even become fashionable to wear a pectoral cross. In any Orthodox church, you can buy a silver and even a gold cross, not to mention jewelry stores.

But, nevertheless, in our time there are situations when a person, for some reason, takes off his pectoral cross.

Can I take off my pectoral cross? And what does this shrine give to a person?

Hieromonk Job (Gumerov) answers:

“We must definitely wear a cross so as not to deviate from the most ancient Christian tradition. When the sacrament of baptism is performed on a person, the priest's hand puts on the cross, and the worldly, unconsecrated hand does not dare to take it off. The cross accompanies us all our lives. We can only replace it if necessary. You can put on a consecrated wooden cross for an operation or a bath.

Hieromonk Job Gumerov

The cross is a material evidence of a person's belonging to the Church of Christ. At the same time, it is a sharp weapon in the spiritual struggle: “Let us mark the life-giving cross on our doors, and on our foreheads, and on our lips, and on our lips, and on every member of ours, and we will arm ourselves with this invincible Christian weapon, the conqueror of death, the hope of the faithful, the light for the ends of the earth, a weapon that opens paradise, overthrows heresies, the affirmation of faith, the great storehouse and saving praise of the Orthodox. We, Christians, will carry this weapon with us in every place, day and night, at every hour and at every minute. Do nothing without it; whether you sleep, get up from sleep, work, eat, drink, are on the road, sail on the sea, cross the river - adorn all your members with the life-giving cross, and evil will not come to you, and the wound will not approach your body (Ps. 90: 10) ”(Ephraim the Syrian, Rev.. Sermon on the General Resurrection, on repentance and love, on the Second Coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Part 1. Word 103).

A person who takes off his pectoral cross or does not wear it at all after baptism suffers from lack of faith and the absence of a real church consciousness. About an immoral person in Russia they said: "There is no cross on him." In the story of I.A. Bunin's "Birds of Heaven", the beggar, to whom the student offers money, says: "Only the demon is poor, there is no cross on him."

Discussion: 6 comments

I took the cross in the hospital on an x-ray. I took it off, although for just a minute I felt like I was naked without protection. I put it on when it was a completely different matter. I don’t know how people walk without a cross. I put it on when I'm in the hospital. I don't take off my cross to sleep. Always on me.

Reply

There is a parable: The devil asks his servant: “Why didn’t you push the women passing through the gorge into the abyss?” - So the first one had a pectoral cross. How can I push it?" “Okay, but the second one didn’t have a cross, she forgot to put it on.” “But approaching the abyss, this woman crossed herself. How could I push her? -Okay, but the third one was without a cross and didn’t cross itself before the abyss, so why didn’t you push it? - But how could I push her, because when leaving the house, her mother crossed her after her. This parable makes everything clear. Yes, the pectoral cross must be worn. And I put on a wooden cross in the bath. But you can’t reach obscurantism: I once read the story of one person that he and his son went to the water park and the security guard did not let them in with a cross, because. according to safety rules, it is impossible for something to be on the neck, because you can catch on and injure at least. This dad found a way out in not letting his son go to the water park. By this he deprived the child of joy, offended. And who will be offended by a child against God? Or dad, but dad will get away with blaming everything on God. And if the guards had let through and God forbid something happened? Who would dad blame then? I think you can take off the cross at night, kissing it and putting it under the icon. Kiss and wear in the morning. What do you think?

Reply

1. Hello, Alexander!
   I think that wearing a cross will not save a person from danger if he is an unbeliever. Putting on a cross, we believe that everything will be fine, the Lord will save. My children were in the water park and they were with crosses, and the Lord saved them. I teach children not to take off the cross anywhere. I was taught that way from childhood. I know another parable. One person was shown how crosses were removed from people, and then there was an explanation that these were the people who did not wear the cross during their lifetime, and their relatives put on the cross after death.
   If we admit the idea that it is not so important to be wearing a cross, in some cases you can take it off, then people come to the conclusion that they almost never wear it. For example, a person took off the cross in the bath, and then forgot to put it on. Or I took it off at night, and in the morning there was vanity, and then a person only in the Church remembers a month later, but I still have the cross at home in images. Therefore, it is better not to allow the thought of removing the cross, and to be wearing a cross.
   With God!

   Reply

Hello. I went to confession and I don't understand much. Batiushka did not ask questions, and so for 3 hours he either called to himself or asked him to wait. The priest said that in order to conceive a child, it is always necessary to remove the cross, miscarriages are an abortion, that I am to blame for them. Although she waited for everyone and didn’t take anything for this, especially since she didn’t go to the hospital even after a miscarriage, she said for my sins, but she was married and lost twins at 10 weeks (her drunk husband drove me to hysterics and everything went into me as a shock because it’s with he behaved like this for the first time, and for 5 years we waited so, probably me but not him). He said that first the registry office, and then the bed, only for more than a year now I have been divorced from my husband, he took off my crown while still married, but I still can’t see men. Who will give a child for adoption alone, but she herself failed to give birth, is it worth starting again? Why is it that who doesn’t need them and give birth and run for an abortion, but you don’t have abortions, it’s true, but the result is the same. Thank you. I hope for an answer, help with a word.

Reply

1. Hello Marina!
   The cross cannot be removed under any circumstances, it is wearable, and must always be on a person. As for the registry office, he was right.
   I advise you to rely on the will of God, to give your life into His hands. Before God, we must show humility, hope. The Lord knows when and what to give you. You pray, live according to the Commandments of God, do good deeds and the Lord will give you everything you need in life. He Himself said about it: “Seek first of all the Kingdom of God and its righteousness, and everything else will be added to you” and "The kingdom of God is within you". That is, you must first of all take care of your soul, then the Lord Himself will give everything, and a good husband and children and everything else.
   Peace and God bless you!

   Reply

“The cross is not in logs, but in ribs,” is a proverb that is more than half a thousand years old. Now, wearing a cross has become an ostentatious, multimillion-dollar fashion, without any awareness and reverence. One must not console oneself with belonging to Christianity, but BE a Christian, without clinging to external paraphernalia and procedures. One must LIVE like a Christian — in aspirations, aspirations, deeds and results. "God is a Spirit" - (from John, 4:23, 24)!!!

Reply

Yuya, 08.07.06 11:22

Hello Moms! Forgive me if this was asked, I couldn't find it. Should a baby wear a cross? If not, at what age should I start, and if so, how? Grandmother suffered today to take communion of the child, and I forgot to put on a cross, the priest cursed, gave an order not to take it off. How did you do?

staisi, 08.07.06 11:42

Naomi
We did not remove the cross from the day of baptism, but I baptized the girls in the second month, as it should be after 40 days. Your father is telling you right. Moreover, the cross is not just like that, it is the protection of the child from all sorts of misfortunes.

Svetka-Sweetie, 08.07.06 11:54

And we have a cross hanging at the head of the bed. Decided not to wear it yet. Ilya pulls for everything - it's scary. cut with a string, and the chain can be irritating.

Although I agree that the cross should be worn. But kids are forgivable. We also dressed for communion, and then took it off.

Katarios, 08.07.06 11:59

Haven't taken off the cross since the day of baptism...

truant, 08.07.06 12:26

Naomi, naturally wears from the moment of christening and never take off. Why take it off?
Svetka-Sweetie, well, a baby cannot cut himself with a string - there were no such cases. If you believe in this, then it’s generally incomprehensible why a baby should be baptized if you don’t believe in the power of the Cross

ksuska, 08.07.06 16:03

we also do not remove the cross from the moment of baptism, except when we swim

Seal, 08.07.06 16:54

We took off the cross once - there was irritation from the rope. Then they dressed again - and still in it. Also, a special cross hangs near the crib, the godmother of her son specially bought it at christening.

Losa, 08.07.06 17:19

Baptized son at 5 months. and since then the cross has not been removed. Only once was when they changed the rope for a silver chain. the child is used to the cross, does not touch, the chain does not interfere with him. Sometimes he will take it in his palm and say "Cross"

Yuya, 08.07.06 19:33

Dressed, on a short rope (not enough for my son). We baptized him at 2 months, and the cross hung on the bed. I kept waiting for when I could put it on, well, probably, the moment has come. Apparently, it was not by chance that she forgot to put on a cross, so that the priest suggested that you should always wear it. Regarding all kinds of bad things, there is also a mother's prayer (strong protection) and even non-baptized children can, in exceptional cases, be christened by the mother herself.

P.S. And you know, I had all the anxiety for him, like they baptized and prayed, but somehow it didn’t feel right, they put on a cross and it became easier for me! And I was so stupid that I was afraid. Thank you girls for your replies!

Incognita, 09.07.06 13:38

as they baptized, I never took off the cross from my son ... it's been a year now already ..
even when I bathe I don’t take it off - we have it on a string, and the head has grown and the string is already too small to take it off, so whether you like it or not - always with a cross ...

Only our grandmother just has some kind of quirk. He is looking for all the reasons to remove the cross. You see, while swimming, the rope gets wet, he walks wet in it and can get sick!. Is it normal? from a wet rope?. (I carefully wipe it with a towel so that it is not completely wet) ....
then somehow the son slept during the day and a scratch appeared on his face .... obviously not a cat, hardly himself. In principle, it looks like he was spinning, the cross pulled up and scratched his muzzle ..... Again, the grandmother was almost in hysterics - take it off cross ..... But every time I firmly promise that I will not remove the cross from a child !! nothing bad will happen from a scratch ..... broken knees look worse .....

I’m calmer when my child is with a cross ..... really I don’t know what to do - he sometimes procrastinates in his mouth ... I don’t allow it, but now he’s such an age - don’t allow something - hysterical ...
but he knows what he has, he will take it in his pen - KESTIK says ... I put on a chain here (I haven’t worn it for a long time). son flies MAMA kestik. (they say mom has a cross) .. pulled out a chain and I don’t have a cross yuuyuon so disappointed “no” and also betrayed his knowledge - pushing the chain back to me by the collar - “I need to sleep” .... (the cross is then they don’t wear it in plain sight, I always remove it if it comes out. The child has already learned it)

Panther, 09.07.06 14:55

How did you do?

As we were dressed during the christening, so we do not take off.

Mariana, 09.07.06 15:00

Naomi We were baptized in three weeks. The cross was not removed at first. Then at night, somehow unsuccessfully, the rope squeezed the neck - it's okay, but it became clear that even a short rope could do something. They didn’t flog any gag, they turned to the priest for advice. He ordered to hang a cross at the head of the bed at night and during sleep, and so you can wear it when under control. From a year old, we switched to the constant wearing of a cross (both day and night, never taking it off). The rope also "shortened" over time, because. the neck does not remain at the same level. Recently, the rope was replaced with a new one, and now we will add an icon of the Vladimir Mother of God to the cross. The daughter treats these objects with reverence, we kiss them and make her parents kiss, and then - by all means hide them in her bosom

then while bathing, you see, the rope gets wet, he walks wet in it and can get sick

Well, nothing, these are all lessons of humility. We had one of our grandmothers in a semi-fainting state because we decided to baptize the child in twenty days. So, nothing, with love, with a smile, with God - everything is conquered

Mermaid, 09.07.06 18:38

I asked this question on the Orthodox forum.
Here is what they answered me.

A: We baptized all the children very early and did not remove the testicles from them, however, they are on a string. Only for 9 years they gave the older chain, and so everyone has a cross on a string, not long and does not choke, they gnaw, right), one piece was bitten off, it was necessary to remove this one and hang it with another, the second daughter swallowed it altogether, but the cross came out naturally and still with her.

MODERATOR: To your question about the cross on the child and in the crib, recently in the TV program "Slavia", the candidate of theology, archpriest Fr. Alexander Ranne. He said this: That a small child can not seriously relate to a pectoral cross, except in rare cases. In the crib on the neck, the child does not need it, hang it somewhere on the crib. On the street, you can put on a cross, but in such a way as to be able to control its wearing. For the child can unconsciously pick it off, take it off or just throw it away. Better, when the child grows up, explain the purpose of the pectoral cross and that he has one, and he can wear it without embarrassment, but rejoicing.

B: Did the Lord Jesus himself wear a cross after being baptized at the age of 30?
Not!
Did the apostles and all believers in Christ wear crosses in the first 200-300 years of church history?
Not!
Wearing or not wearing gives nothing, neither to man nor to God.

The tradition of amulets was brought into the church by pagans.
If you want the best for your child, protect him in the name of Jesus Christ: "Lord Jesus! Lord Jesus!...Glory to Thee!.." Demons, spirits of disease and, in general, everything satanic run away from His name. Only the Name of Jesus protects, not dead things or traditions.

Glory to our Lord Jesus Christ

Q: Wearing a pectoral cross is mandatory for an Orthodox Christian. I have three children, all were baptized in infancy, I never had problems with crosses, they wore them without taking them off. Try to replace the chain with a soft rope and make it shorter so that the girl does not get tangled in it and does not gnaw

The cross, indeed, would be nice to hang on a ribbon or ribbon, not long. This is done not only for children, but also for adults who value the relic - the cross and do not want to lose it (the chains are torn so often!). It is obligatory to wear a cross - this is not only a symbol of Christianity, but also a real weapon that protects a Christian from the devil. For a baby who is not yet able to pray and be baptized on his own, this is especially important. The holiness and power of the cross does not depend in any way on the degree of understanding of it by your baby (otherwise some tried to push through a similar idea here).

As far as you can see, there is no complete agreement on this issue either.
We wear if there is no irritation. (Sometimes from the heat from the contact begins an allergy under the chain).

squirrel, 09.07.06 21:57

Probably, it is better to resolve such issues with the priest, to whom you confess. The priest told us not to take it off, my grandmother insisted that they take it off and hang it on the bed, for two days the baby was without a cross, then they put it on again - it’s so calmer for me

Simonetta, 09.07.06 23:16

My Sonechka often takes a cross in her hands, looks at it, pulls on the rope when she sees that it doesn’t stretch, leaves it, and is distracted. We do not remove the cross, but the rope needs to be changed, it gets dirty.

Vera, 18.08.06 22:59

And we noim so. Over the shoulder. This is the experience for the fourth child. Without a cross, no, no. And the eldest is already on the chain.

Ilmik, 18.08.06 23:01

We were baptized at 7 months, so we still walk with this cross. Never filmed
I would already put it on a chain, since three years are still on the nose, the rope has become quite dirty

Valushka, 19.08.06 00:22

My children don’t wear crosses. My sister’s cross caught on the playpen and she hung right on the rope. That’s when I got scared. Mom left me at home to look after her, what if something happened?!
This case left its mark. Everyone has their own cross with a chain. If they want, they will wear it.

illen, 19.08.06 09:19

However, if a person believes that the object protects him, then this is already idolatry, an abomination before the Lord. (See the second commandment)

This point of view is closest to me.
IMHO I'm afraid to wear a baptismal cross on my daughter. She is still small, she will chew it, pull it, hook it on something, maybe ... it’s even scary to think.

truant, 19.08.06 16:27

Valushka, illen, no offense - but that's what people are most afraid of, that's what they suffer from. I've never heard a single story that a child suffered from the cross.
illen, the quote that you cited from the post of the Mermaid is not the answer of an Orthodox priest, it is the answer of a Protestant.

Ariel, 19.08.06 16:43

Girls, but I completely understand with my mind that my daughter should not suffer from the cross, but I’m still afraid to dress her, just because of fearful suffocation. Yes, and we were not baptized with a cross, Catholics do not dress at baptism. Pradva, they say that the Spaniards and Latin Americans still dress, I don’t know. But we have a consecrated cross.

illen, 19.08.06 18:05

truant Perhaps I won't argue.
I just don’t believe that a child can be deprived of protection and patronage just because his mother didn’t put a cross on him in infancy.

PS By the way, my grandmother says that in the villages they hung a cross on a cradle

truant, 19.08.06 18:21

QUOTE (illen)

I just don’t believe that a child can be deprived of protection and patronage just because his mother didn’t put a cross on him in infancy.

Well, no one is saying that. I won’t tell you for sure now, and I won’t find any references, but in general, a baptized person is not supposed to remove the cross at all under any circumstances. But there is no connection with protection and patronage, in my opinion. A baptized person immediately comes under the protection of his Guardian Angel, and whether he wears a cross or not is, of course, sad, but not fatal. the whole point here is that often the cross after Baptism is removed from themselves or from the child by people who are far from faith. Who are baptized precisely "for protection and patronage", and not because they believe in Christ
: Villages, unfortunately, in this regard, is not a decree for a believer. It was the semi-pagan village beliefs that inflicted so much on Orthodoxy that, I'm afraid, it will never be disassembled

illen, 19.08.06 18:42

Villages, unfortunately, in this regard are not a decree for a believer. It was the semi-pagan village beliefs that inflicted so much on Orthodoxy that, I'm afraid, it will never be disassembled

I completely agree - there is such a steep "batch" of Orthodoxy and paganism that you really can't make out. I led the example to the fact that such a practice of "not wearing" was already not invented by modern "godless".

truant, 19.08.06 18:48

the pectoral cross must be worn by every Orthodox Christian, because. it is a testimony and preaching of Christianity. Every Christian carries his own cross, laid on him at Baptism, because our Lord Jesus Christ Himself said: “... and whoever does not bear his cross and follow Me cannot be My disciple” (Luke 14:27). The pectoral cross is evidence that we are Christians - this is the image of our life cross on the way to God

illen Moreover - and in the cities not everyone wore Look at any pre-revolutionary Russian portraits - right from the emergence of secular painting in Russia. Apparently, the practice of not wearing the cross began with Peter I with the introduction of Western fashion - open dresses. Or maybe he is here and nothing to do with it. It is difficult for me to judge this - I am not a historian, and I did not go into this issue. But one thing seems obvious to me - wearing a pectoral cross cannot harm a person.

Lady, 29.09.06 10:51

Wearing or not wearing gives nothing, neither to man nor to God.
However, if a person believes that the object protects him, then this is already idolatry, an abomination before the Lord. (See the second commandment)

I completely agree. But the Lord protects us in life, and not some kind of crosses and icons

Tanyushik, 29.09.06 10:57

By the way, the apostles did not wear crosses.
But my kids will...

dekolka, 06.12.06 21:57

They were baptized on the 40th day, and have not been removed since! I think that the cross can not be removed! This is sacred! By the way, I have never heard of a child strangled with a cross. My nephew is a year old, so she often takes out her cross and kisses. And in the corner of the crib, we hung the icon of the patroness.

Elvira, 21.12.06 12:04

My kids wear their crosses almost all the time. And I bathe them with crosses too. We have the most common - silver, bought in the temple. Due to the fact that silver, my grandmother and I swore a lot. She believes that children should only wear gold and only on a gold chain, because. She sees this with her own eyes all the time. I bought my crosses with chains in jewelry stores, consecrated them. I only put it on my daughter, I didn’t become a baby, like I haven’t grown yet. Well, we quarreled. I barely demanded my daughter's cross. Here's how to be? Argue, swear - well, there is no strength. And so for 20 years we have been living in a state of war.

Anna Khrustaleva, 21.12.06 12:44

QUOTE (Tanyushik)

But my children will

My girls, when drawing princesses, do not forget to draw a cross on their neck!
Matyusha wears, of course, from the moment the priest put a cross around his neck.
I really know for myself that chains often break, so I put them on a cord for children, sometimes I change the cord when it gets greasy.
But the godfather said that there is a baptismal and carrying cross, that is, it seems like the baptismal one is kept at home so that it does not get lost. Of course, it happens with children that the rope will untie, or the shackle will break, or they went for an x-ray - they forced Ulyasha to remove the cross. Then he can really get lost. Therefore, for girls, I have spare crosses. And I myself have been wearing the same since the moment of baptism.
Of course, the main thing is faith, not the cross. But this is not a reason to neglect the pectoral cross. The cross is a visible evidence of our faith, our shrine. You can always kiss him, he is always with you.

ASTRA's, 22.12.06 20:01

She baptized her daughter at 1.5 months, at first she clung a cross to her clothes from above, then she put it on a chain, but she quickly tore and her daughter did not like it. Now my daughter has grown up (2 years 3 months), wears it constantly on a string, got used to it, it doesn’t interfere with her, but on the contrary, she likes it. I'm afraid to leave a child without a cross.

Nelumbo nelumbo, 24.12.06 06:24

Our friends have a kid at 2.5 years old ... bit off and swallowed a cross. They went to the ambulance to do x-rays. Everything worked out, the cross didn’t get stuck anywhere and safely came out “on the other side” ... But the very idea that the cross had to be looked for in poop, even if it was the poop of an innocent child ... Brrrr!

The rite of baptism ends with chrismation. Before that, a shirt and a cross are put on the baby. However, after you leave the temple, the pectoral cross from the child can be removed.

Church opinion

The cross is a symbol of faith. A witness to the world that a person accepts Jesus Christ and belongs to Him. By itself, this accessory is not a talisman and does not carry any power in itself. The Lord keeps the baby, not a piece of iron. Therefore, it is wrong to believe that God will help the baby only if a cross hangs around his neck. It is also wrong to think that Jesus Christ will be angry with the baby and his godparents because the baby does not wear a cross.

At baptism, you dedicate your baby to the Lord. At this moment, a child is born from above - in the spiritual world. Now God Himself will take care of the baby, and when the baby grows up, the godparents are obliged to raise him in the faith. After all, they make a promise to the Lord that they will help the baby become an Orthodox Christian.

In this spiritual process, the pectoral cross has a symbolic meaning. You can leave it on the baby, or you can remove the cross from the baby immediately after returning from the temple and hang it in the nursery. You also have the right to wear it to the baby under clothes from time to time. For example, while walking or visiting church. The main thing is to understand: the pectoral cross is not a talisman, but a symbol of faith. If you want the Lord to keep a child, just pray for him. God will hear you and answer your requests.

Opinion of pediatricians

First of all, you need to think about the safety of the baby. The church allows wearing crosses made of different metals: gold, silver and even aluminum. However, most of them have sharp edges. A baby can be scratched badly on a pectoral cross, because in the first 18 months of life, his skin is still very thin and delicate. In addition, after a while, the baby will begin to pull it into his mouth. The cross can damage the baby's palate and gums. And because of the bacteria that will accumulate on the surface of the accessory, the child will periodically suffer from intestinal disorders. Another problem is skin irritation. Even a soft ribbon will inevitably rub the baby's neck. Therefore, it is better to put on a pectoral cross for a child when he grows up. For example, at three years old. Until then, the creed can hang in the nursery.

If you want the cross to be on the child from the first days of life, approach your decision with all responsibility. To keep your baby safe, it is best to choose a small wooden accessory (preferably hardwood, such as oak or ash). At the same time, it must be regularly treated with wet baby wipes and constantly ensure that the baby does not put the cross in his mouth, eyes and ears. For a rope, choose a soft ribbon made of natural fabric with a lock. However, even such precautions do not guarantee that during sleep the baby will not get hurt on the cross, turning from back to side, or will not get tangled in the rope.

Since the Church allows babies not to wear pectoral crosses every day (with the exception of sacred rites and sacraments, visiting a temple with a child), for safety reasons, it is better to put a pectoral cross on a child’s neck when he reaches a conscious age.

When we christened the baby (he was 2 months old), the issue of wearing a pectoral cross became just a stumbling block: I took it off as soon as we returned from the church, because. considered that for a small child this jewelry carries a real danger of suffocation. However, many of my friends and relatives insist that the baby wear it all the time. Arguments: this will protect him from many troubles, as a real Christian is supposed to, nothing bad will ever happen to a child because of a cross, etc., etc. ... Now my son is 6 months old, and the issue with the cross for our family is the same not resolved:
1) To wear or not to wear?
2) If not, at what age?
3) If so, are there any precautions that need to be taken?
I have not been able to find objective information on this issue. As a pediatrician, please put an end to this issue so that peace reigns in our family.

Responsible

Arguments in favor of the cross require, first of all, faith and are theoretical (non-proven) in nature.
Arguments against are due to practical experience - situations where the pectoral cross becomes a source of injury (cut, strangulation) take place. It cannot be said that very often, but the facts have a place to be.
Belief in anything is too subtle a matter for arguments "conditioned by practical experience" to be perceived abstractly and without prejudice to the feelings of believers.
If you believe, you can and should wear it. At any age.
Two top tips to minimize risk as much as possible:
1. The circumference of the chain (strings, threads, etc.) should be approximately twice the circumference of the neck.
2. The chain (rope, thread, etc.) should break under the influence of a weight half as much as the weight of the child's body.
The final decision is yours.

A reader turned to us with a question: “I am often asked if a baby can take off a cross, for example, before going to bed or bathing ... I answer - no. But that's my personal opinion. Perhaps I am wrong. I told my daughter that if she takes off the cross, then she will renounce Christ. The husband thinks it is not. Many are afraid of suffocation and therefore do not put on small children a cross. How to be? Can babies take off the cross or not? Does the one who takes off his cross really renounce God? Answered by Archpriest Nikolai Markovsky, rector of the village. Zaitsevo.

Let's first understand why a Christian wears a cross. The cross is a symbol of our salvation. Putting it on the neck, we thereby make it clear that we are with Christ, we remember that He ascended the Cross, was crucified on it and atoned for our sins. We have received salvation through the death of our Savior on the cross, of which we testify. An adult person leading a conscious spiritual life must always have a cross on him. But we must understand that he is not a talisman, but a symbol of our salvation. Often people attach some mystical meaning to the cross, and sometimes even an occult one. The cross was lost, fell somewhere, broke - they believe that this will lead to grief, trouble, illness, bad changes in life. What to say? - do not confuse earthly and heavenly. Any cross is made of some material, and it can break, get lost, and so on. There is no need to attach any special significance to this, otherwise it turns out that we believe not in the risen Christ, but in the power of the subject. This is an erroneous faith that is close to paganism.

As for the cross on babies - of course, I baptize babies, put crosses on them and recommend not to take them off. But we are reasonable people. The child twists his arms and legs, puts them under the lace and this can somehow harm himself. There is no harm in the fact that the mother will remove the cross from the child at night and hang it at the head of the crib or stroller. If there is some kind of medical intervention - an operation, an x-ray, an examination - it's okay if you take off the cross, put it in your pocket, wrap it around your hand, squeeze it in your fist. Those who claim that it is impossible to remove the cross in any case are very deeply mistaken. As a priest, I say with all responsibility: there is no sin in removing the cross from a child for some time - so that it is near him. You can even come to a church shop and buy a special bracelet to which to attach a cross - then parents may not be afraid that the child will choke with a cord or harm themselves in some other way.

The question asked has one more aspect: the assertion that by removing the cross, the daughter will renounce Christ. This is a substitution of concepts and manipulation. If a person consciously says that he refuses Christ, does not want to be with Him, then this is renunciation. It is a completely different matter if, due to some circumstances, he removes the cross for a while. We have already mentioned medical examinations, here it is worth mentioning contact sports - wrestling, basketball and the like, during which it is forbidden to have crosses, chains and anything else on your neck. My son has been playing basketball for many years, and during the game he always took off the cross, put it in a special pocket with a zipper. This is necessary so as not to be injured during the match. What renunciation are we talking about here? Man does not renounce Christ, but ensures his own security.

Perhaps the daughter of the author of the question is a teenager and is experiencing a crisis of faith, does not want to go to church, takes off her cross - and the mother, worrying, thus tries to protect the child from mistakes. What to say? - Yes, the child grows up, changes, lives in his own interests. He needs to be given time to realize who he is in this world. When parents begin to press the child hard, they do not benefit him. I do not know of cases where such pressure ended in something good. The child should be given the opportunity to choose.

I will give an example from my practice. We have quite a few children in our parish, and we have introduced a tradition for them to take turns reading the third or sixth hour before Liturgy. Some like it, and they prepare with joy and responsibility, for others it does not cause either desire or interest. There is one girl who bored this reading, and then in the circle of children she said that she did not like it. I asked that they not touch her yet: let her go to church, listen to others read, and decide for herself whether she needs it or not. And for those who read with joy, we gradually increase the load - we add the reading of the sixth hour or prayers before communion.

We are dealing with a fragile child's psyche and can do much harm by loading the unwanted. One cannot bring one to Christ by force, bend over the knee, forcing one to read the rule, go to the liturgy, or wear a cross. With such an attitude towards the child and his fragile faith, we will only cause harm. He will run away from the temple as far as he can, at the first opportunity, because there they put pressure on him, spiritually raped him, and this is unacceptable. I would advise all parents to treat the psyche of their children very reverently and with great attention and in no case force them to be in the Church. You can talk softly, show something by your example - after all, often parents who force you to read the rule or stand for long services do not have peace among themselves or simply do not live the way the child is taught. Children see this, and they have a dissonance that does not contribute to either strengthening faith or improving relationships with parents.

Another example: one priest told how as a child he was forced to go to long monastic services, which was torture for him. Being already an adult, he does not go to that monastery at all, since it is connected in his mind with childhood trauma. We must take this into account. The temple should bring joy, the happiness of communion with God, inner peace, and not bad memories.

Recorded by Ekaterina Shcherbakova