How to attract a person. How to make the right person appear in life? You chose the wrong path in life

How to attract the right person into your life when you need it? Or maybe you wanted someone you don't like to disappear from your life?

Then this effective method, which I use all the time, will help you.

How to attract the right person

Every night, before going to bed, I lie down and do relaxation exercises¹ of the whole body, gradually moving into a state of meditation².

If, for example, I need to establish a relationship with a girl or attract some acquaintance that I need, in a state of meditation I imagine the person I need against a blue sky background. Then mentally, in a commanding tone, I tell him to appear in my life (naturally, this should be a familiar person) and meet with me.

Then for some time I lie in a relaxed state, and then I let go of this desire and forget about it. I also sincerely believe that everything will happen exactly as I need. After some time (always in different ways) this person appears in my life.

How to get rid of a person?

In the same way, this experience works if I need to get rid of an unnecessary person, there is no violence here, understand me correctly). I relax and in meditation create an image of a person unpleasant to me against the blue background of the sky. Then I order him to disappear from my life or not interfere with me in anything.

After my order, he instantly dissolves into this sky, and I see only one blank screen. It doesn't take long to make a wish come true. I just forget about the person, the calls immediately stop, and he disappears from my life ...

You probably know such people who seem to be so charming that everyone likes them without exception. An amazing personality trait, commonly called charisma, is difficult to define, however, this does not mean that this mysterious quality cannot be developed in oneself. It would be a wish! To help you, we have compiled a list of actions that will support and strengthen your charisma and self-confidence.

1. Master the “art of intimacy”

"Intimacy" is the most important aspect of charisma. In fact, this is the ability to show the interlocutor that all your attention is focused on him.

In fact, the art of intimacy emphasizes one simple thing to always remember when developing charisma: you are here in the background.

When you think of charisma, you can think of it as an attempt to, as they say, "put yourself in", to conduct a competent self-presentation. However, the paradoxical secret of charisma is that the main task here is not to trumpet everyone about your wonderful qualities, but to make people feel great around you.

Real charisma is not directed inward, but outward, into the world. True, we all love ourselves very much, and we like to talk about ourselves. The people in your life that you find likable and charismatic are the ones who allow you to be yourself and talk about yourself. So be positive, push your ego away and turn all your attention to the interlocutor.

It's really very simple.

Pay attention to every word that comes out of the mouth of the interlocutor. Imagine that you are watching an interesting movie, or reading a book, and gradually get to know the main character better. The most important thing here is to listen and not think about what you will say when he is done.

2. Develop a sense of self-confidence

Confidence can be a great springboard for building charisma, but it also needs to be worked on. On the one hand, you don't want to look arrogant. On the other hand, you do not want to appear timid and constrained.

It all comes down to feeling good about being yourself. A few simple tricks to help build confidence, we described in.

3. Master the art of conversation

First of all, decide what you want and don't want to say. When there is something in the conversation that makes you feel embarrassed, the tone of the conversation may change or even the conversation will simply end if your interlocutor is tactful and does not want to embarrass you.

And good interlocutors know how to raise others to their level. Tell and share your experience. Use humor, refer to quotes, read the book "How to be an interesting conversationalist."

Last but not least, the ability to ask questions. People like to be heard. The questioner usually controls the meeting. In addition, the right question can say a lot more about the depth of your knowledge than annoying boasting.

There are many books devoted to the ability to ask the right questions, but we want to give a special mention to “Just Say No!” by Jim Camp. This author built one of the most effective negotiation systems, one of the main aspects of which is the ability to ask the interlocutor the right questions.

Imagine yourself as a talk show host. These shows are hosted by nice, charismatic, charming and funny people, but most of the time they do nothing but ask questions. Because charisma is mostly about listening to others, not talking about yourself.

4. Practice effective eye contact

Sometimes good eye contact is better than any words in communication. Properly made eye contact can show that you are listening, that you are interested, and that you perceive the interlocutor as a person.

A glance at the floor, or a wandering look, shows that the interlocutor is not interesting to you, and that your attention is focused on something else.

Practicing eye contact is difficult, but still possible. Try to maintain eye contact for a second longer than normal. How do you feel about it? How does the interlocutor feel? Remember: there are plenty of opportunities to try this. Train on waiters, bartenders, cashiers.

Over time, you will begin to feel what works and what does not.

When making eye contact, how long it lasts is important. If you are unsure of yourself and don't know how to start, try focusing on the color of your interlocutor's eyes. Try to notice the eye color of every person you interact with and make it a habit. This is the type of eye contact that will help you appear more confident without looking like a weirdo.

5. Use the body to express emotions

Use your own body to emphasize and enhance sensations and emotions: gesture, smile, be animated, but do not overdo it: do not spin in place like a top. Just emphasize your positive emotions from communication with facial expressions and gestures.

And a couple more words about bad types of expressive behavior. For example, nodding is a great way to show someone that you are listening. But too many nods are bad, it's better to do nothing at all. Because in this case, the interlocutor quickly realizes that you are only trying to show that you are listening, after which he will feel stupid.

6. When in doubt - “mirror”

Mirroring is the easiest way to add charisma to yourself. Match the other person's demeanor and expression level, and you'll see how well they'll start to respond to it. You don't have to agree with everything the other person says or does, just try to behave and act the way they do.

You can also try to "mirror" the helpful qualities you find in others. In general, when it comes to charisma, observation of others becomes the main tool and success factor. Watch and adopt. After all, this is how, through copying, children learn basic life skills from adults.

Feel free to use this method. Copying can even give you extra confidence: feeling "in someone else's shoes" you will automatically look at the world from a slightly different angle.

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Is it possible to attract a person with the power of thought? More often, girls think about this, to whom a sense of pride and dignity does not allow them to openly admit their feelings for a man. works, and you can use it not only in personal relationships, you can attract a person, things, and events.

How does this happen?

This information is not just fiction. The scientists who conducted the research came to the conclusion that thought, although it cannot be seen, is a material substance. With the power of thought, you can influence the state of your body and other people. Therefore, it is not in vain that they say that you need to think positively, and the expectation of trouble attracts them.

Basics

What is necessary for the power of thought to start working:

Sequencing

From the first time, almost no one succeeds in attracting the desired object with the power of thought. This requires long training, so if you want to achieve your goal, you will have to tune in to serious and long-term work.

1. You need to relax, take a comfortable position - lie down or sit in a chair. Close your eyes and imagine the object you want to attract. At the same time, it should be presented in detail - clothes, gestures, facial expressions. The person must be in a good mood, let him smile at you. Visualize how an energy connection arises between you, send your positive impulses to him, watching how responses come from him to you.
2. Watch what the person is doing now, how he is distracted from his studies, remembering you, picks up the phone and dials your number. It may seem impossible, but this trick often works.

Making affirmations

The combination of visualization with a verbal expression of desire strengthens your energy flow and accelerates its movement. Many girls are trying to find conspiracies that will help find the other half or attract a person who is already in life.

What is a conspiracy? This is the same energy message, an appeal to the Universe. Whether or not to turn to magic, each person decides for himself. Some of the proposed texts can also be negative, attempts to enslave the will of another person, which is fraught with destruction.

Therefore, it is safer and more effective to create your own affirmation - filled with goodness, tenderness and love. If you want a familiar person to call you, then pronounce this desire, specifying the time at which the call should sound.

At the same time, experts in the field of esotericism talk about how important it is to let go of your desire and not think about a person, not wait for this call. That is, at first you concentrate as much as possible on your desire, put all your positive energy into it and let go to work in the Universe. Constantly holding a thought in your head does not allow it to “detach” from you.

Don't expect results to come the first time. And do not forget about the difference in energy - if your partner is stronger and more stable emotionally, then it can be difficult to “break through” to him. But that doesn't mean it's impossible. To attract a person with a thought, you must be calm, confident and act systematically. Do not give up training, continue to develop these abilities in yourself. And you will see that everything is possible.

Elizabeth, Izhevsk

The strongest magnet for a man is an attractive woman.

Attractiveness as a quality of personality - the possession of the ability attract, bring people closer to you, arouse interest in yourself.

I am like a magnet. And not because I attract people. I just stick to the fridge.

Attractiveness - the ability to attract people to your line of life. Attractiveness is when the vast majority loves you. An attractive person does not force anyone into the orbit of his life. People, like bees to honey, voluntarily flock to him.

Why do they love me? Why are people drawn to me like a magnet? Attractiveness often asks itself such questions and does not find an answer. First of all, in an attractive personality, people are attracted by her confidence in herself and in her abilities.

Power is always drawn to. The Force is calm, balanced and satisfied. A person who is satisfied with life causes enduring sympathy. No one likes the eternally dissatisfied whiners and bores. Napoleon Hill, the king of success, wrote: “I have great wealth that no one can take away, that can never be squandered, never lost due to a fall in the value of shares or unsuccessful investments. My wealth is satisfaction with life ... "

In an attractive person, charisma, charm, charm are clearly expressed. He is successful both at work and in the family. People are overwhelmed with complexes, and when they meet a person who is free from complexes, some kind of pernicious obsession, they involuntarily reach for this benevolent energy. Everyone wants to get into the orbit of success, where they don’t burden you with their problems, where they give you joy, inspire and inspire, instill enthusiasm, optimism and a crazy charge of psychological vigor.

An attractive person is kind and forgiving. In communication, he keeps his false ego on a short leash. People feel it right away. Confrontation arises immediately when the false ego wakes up. The man spoke to himself in a benevolent tone - everyone listened attentively with pleasure. As soon as he turned on his egoism, the ego of those around him wakes up sharply, gets excited and begins to call the mind and feelings to protest. As soon as egoism appears in words, the desire to prove one's importance and significance, disputes, abuse and squabbles immediately arise.

An attractive person has strong views and principles. This circumstance does not deter people. On the contrary, they respect his world outlook, because, firstly, it has passed the test of practice, as evidenced by the success of an attractive personality, and secondly, it is presented in such a benevolently calm tone that people do not have the slightest intention to tear at a vest and with foam at the mouth to prove to everyone that he was right.

Attractive person makes friends with a smile. When people are in trouble, attractive people are indispensable. Their presence alone inspires confidence that all problems will be solved in a safe way. Openness, sincerity and naturalness are the calling card of attraction.

An attractive person never imitates anyone. An extraordinary, inquisitive mind, free from inertia and mossy, provides an opportunity for the manifestation of originality and originality. An attractive person has found his life purpose and successfully implements it in practice. He always remains himself. Therefore, his life is bright and full of interesting deeds and accomplishments. The love of an attractive person in his work attracts people, most of whom are forced to engage in disgusting work, which gives only the means of everyday existence.

An attractive person is a master of limitations, that is, the ability to keep the necessary distance. In communication, he does not allow relationships to slide to a state of coldness and aloofness, but he also does not allow others to unceremoniously invade their personal space, turning relationships into familiarity, familiarity, and, even more so, into an endless French kiss. Attractiveness knows how to place restrictive barriers. She knows that feelings tend to go through stages of hunger, satiation, satiety, and disgust. If you hug and kiss all the time, there is a risk of getting fed up. And you must always be attractive and desirable.

Philosopher Vyacheslav Ruzov says: “Unlimitedness always leads to satiety. And what satiety requires is novelty. Therefore, a restricted schema is an opportunity to preserve love, relationships, and attraction. Therefore, the system with restrictions just creates the proper level of sexual attractiveness in the family. Unfortunately, the lack of restrictions removes this level of sexual attractiveness and ordinary, satiety appears, and therefore the search for a new one. If we talk about betrayal, then it is the restrictions in the family that this is the scheme that creates this proper level of attraction to each other. No wonder many spiritual traditions recommend that a husband and wife sleep in separate rooms. Such a distance increases the attractiveness and desirability of the spouses to each other.

If a couple's relationship is based on sex, it is difficult for them to last more than seven years. The attractiveness of the spouses is rapidly rushing to zero. There is a desire for diversity in sex. Psychologist Ruslan Narushevich claims that when this thirst for ever-increasing happiness in intimate relationships reaches its limit, and you feel that you can’t get anything new here, collapse begins, because each of the spouses begins to think that the problem is that it’s just “not enough spouses” or “few women” simply – one woman is not enough for me. A person begins to think seriously and adjust the theory to fit it. Because his appetite for ever-increasing happiness is natural. But since he is looking for him all the time on the "lower floor" - it turns out that this is a collapse, a divorce.

A man should always discover something new in his wife. Only then does she become attractive to him. Or stay. You will say: “Well, why should a wife be a clown all the time? Any new tricks to master? All the time somehow to show themselves or to build something. Or an artist? No. It turns out that the more a man listens to a woman, the more she begins to understand herself. The more she understands herself, the more she discovers something new in herself and begins to believe in it. And then it starts in a new way. For example, women whom a man actively listens to can dramatically change their hairstyle. Boldly. Even though I've been afraid all my life. Or maybe, for the first time in many years, make up. Because she realized that she was not so bad, that you could talk to her for an hour and listen to her.

Therefore, the attractiveness, the novelty of bodily and spiritual properties for a woman comes through communication. Realization through communication. And for a man - through solitude and reflection. Therefore, in a family it is very important that each of the spouses receive both. That is, each, respectively, what he needs. That is, a man received moments of solitude or moments where he would improve.

How does a man become attractive? A man becomes attractive, improving. Yesterday it was like this, today it is an order of magnitude higher, today it is even higher. And how does this appearance of various - novelty of bodily and spiritual qualities happen for a woman? You just need to open them and that's it. There is no need to attract anything. Just believe - believe that there is a lot of beauty in me, you can believe in it if you start telling someone, and he listens to you attentively and admires it. Admires the mind, admires the ideas, admires the way things look, talks to you, laughs together at what is funny. Compassion for what you sympathize with. This is how a woman begins to show a wide variety of qualities and becomes attractive.

Petr Kovalev 2014

How can we overcome something negative without resisting it? This question reveals one of those delusions that (sometimes for a lifetime) prevents us from getting what we want.

We think that by resisting negativity, we will be freed from it. But it's not. In many cases, we get the freedom to create what we want only after we have stopped resisting.
By resisting our desires, we only add fuel to the fire. So we're only making the situation worse. If we resist what is undesirable for us, then we completely concentrate on it; we act on the assumption that external circumstances will prevent us from getting what we want.

Let's look at a few examples.

If at work we are against communicating with certain people, it certainly turns out that we are forced to deal with them on business all the time. The more we fight some habits of our children, the stronger they become. If we, fearing to get fat, resist the urge to eat dessert, we crave it even more. When we don't want to pay bills, they just seem to flunk us. When we are in a hurry and are afraid to get into a "traffic jam" - you can be sure that we will spend at least half an hour in it.
Because of this resistance, a person denies his inner power to create or attract what he wants. Actively focusing on what we don't want weakens our ability to get what we want. It's hard to be sure that you can make dreams come true if you think only about what you haven't achieved. It is not easy to experience a state of inner happiness, love and peace if you try to look for it outside.
This does not mean that a person should ignore everything that he does not want. But instead of resisting negativity, it can be used. Negative emotions will help you feel what you want and focus on it. The ability to create your own future depends entirely on the attempts to do this and on the life position of a person. Do not resist, but be aware and let go of negative emotions, and then attention will turn to what you want.

Resistance reinforces the belief that we cannot get what we want. We automatically begin to accumulate signs of our own impotence and eventually lose touch with our creative potential. We create what we believe in. The human mind is much more powerful than most people think. 90% of what happens in life is caused by our mental images, and only 10% - by actions.
A person who believes that he can have more, but cannot achieve what he wants, should take a closer look at his experiences. And then he will certainly see that deep down he does not believe in his success. On the contrary, continuing to believe in the desired in the most hopeless situations, a person strengthens his faith and beliefs. When you believe, challenges make you stronger and strengthen your faith.

We create what we believe in.

When a feeling of hopelessness takes precedence over a person's self-confidence, he begins to unnecessarily resist the world. Instead of accepting what he has and working to get what he wants, he spends all his energy resisting the existing situation. When we resist another person or situation, we give desire the wrong direction.
Instead of striving for calmness and cooperation, we want to get rid of something. Instead of trying to complete the project, we spend a huge amount of energy dodging work. Instead of settling relations, we waste our mental strength in vain, hoping to change the behavior of partners. We focus on what we don't want and think back to times when we didn't get what we wanted. Instead, we should focus on what we want and remember the times we got it.
We resist the behavior of partners, feeling that they do not like them. Instead of demonstrating our friendliness to colleagues, to interest them, we wait until they once again offend or disappoint us. In any case, by resisting the situation, we waste energy and continue to get what we resist, not getting any closer to what we really want.

What we resist will stubbornly return.

You get what you focus on. Unwanted, fueled by your attention, only increases. When you pay attention to something and experience strong negative emotions at the same time, you once again attract to yourself what you resist. What you pay attention to increases in your life
When you resist something, you keep creating it because you believe that it is impossible to get rid of it. The feeling of hopelessness was the source of your resistance, and it will reappear if you believe that you cannot get what you want.

By resisting, you reinforce the belief that you cannot get what you want.

Imagine that you know: a check for a million dollars is due in the mail in your name. In this case, you would not resist paying any bills and would not be afraid to sign them. You wouldn't want the bills to disappear. Assuming that you have enough money, you would not resist the need to spend it.
Imagine that your partner is sick, but you know for sure that he will recover soon. Will you, having such information, drop all your affairs and begin to personally care for him? You are not afraid that he will feel abandoned, you do not resist the disease and do not consider that this is a heavy burden.
Your resistance fades because you are sure that you will get what you want. Your confidence that everything will be fine will keep you from falling into the trap of resistance. With this understanding, it will also become clear that in order to succeed, we need to give up the idea of ​​resisting anything. The next step is gaining the confidence to get what you want.

Nothing strengthens her like the first success.

Achieving success is like a snowball rolling down a mountain. The longer it rolls, the bigger it gets. Likewise, achieving even a small amount of success strengthens your faith. Following him comes a new, more impressive luck. It will give you even more confidence.
Along with it, your next success will increase. Now you believe in yourself, filled with enthusiasm. You just radiate positive energy and confidence! Once having gained speed, a person often continues to roll by inertia. Nothing contributes to success like success.
Once you understand this, you can understand why it is so important to define your desires every day. If you made a wish and it came true, you will feel a surge of strength from the knowledge that you are able to attract what you want into your life. However, small miracles will never happen again if you stop feeling appreciation for them. Nothing contributes to success like success. To achieve personal success, we need to feel and act in accordance with our true desires. Unfortunately, most of our daily aspirations come from the very habit of resistance. Such desires are not true. Instead of attracting what you really want into your life, false desires deprive you of energy and reinforce the belief that you are powerless to get what you want.
By focusing on the unwanted, you reinforce your belief that you are unable to get what you want.
Let's say you're stuck in a traffic jam. If you are in a hurry, you want the car to move as fast as possible. By resisting the traffic situation, you focus on what you don't want and thereby reinforce your inability to get what you want. Most likely, you will intuitively prefer the lane in which the cars move the slowest. And even if you taxi to not the worst, you will think that it is the worst of all. Why (for example, in a supermarket) is the last package of the desired product always taken from you in front of your nose? Why, when you are in a hurry and worried, do you get in a line that barely moves? This is not an accident. There is clearly a pattern here. In a hurry, being in an unbalanced state, you will choose the slowest queue.
If we are in a hurry, then in the supermarket we stand in line, which moves more slowly than all the others. If you are not in alignment with your inner center, you will unconsciously (“intuitively”) choose the wrong path. By resisting circumstances, we only exacerbate the situation. By focusing on not wanting to wait, we will be forced to wait longer.

Why does the past repeat itself

The above is another reason why it is so important to heal old wounds. If you have experienced painful experiences in the past (for example, in business or personal relationships), then you will strive to avoid them again. Resisting suffering can bring it on again. However, if you have not been offended before, you will not think much about the offense, but will naturally focus on what you want. That is what will be attracted into your life.
Resistance to painful experiences creates the possibility of re-experiencing them.
It is very difficult not to resist the bad things that happen. Once a disaster has happened, we naturally do not want it to happen again. But by focusing on this unwillingness, we re-attract suffering to a certain extent. The more fully we have healed our past, the less we will be disturbed by the shadows of the past. Until we get rid of the pain associated with past events, some of their negative aspects will repeat and annoy us.

For example, if we passionately do not want to be alone, that is what we will get. If we don't want to be rejected and ignored, that's exactly what will happen. If we are horrified by the possibility of losing something, it will be lost. If we are oppressed by the thought of an unloved job, it will remain a source of trouble. If we simply cannot work with a certain person, we will have to deal with him all the time.
The more we do not want something, the more it is attracted to our lives.
By learning to heal past wounds, we allow the old pain to go away, and with it, the subconscious expectation of its repetition. From now on, we will be free to focus more on what we want. Our positive desires will increase to the extent that we have been able to get rid of past grievances.


If you do not let go of your past, it will appear to you again and again. By resisting negative experiences, you will automatically attract situations that will cause unpleasant emotions. Resistance not only prevents you from attracting what you really want, but also dissipates power. It's like a hole in your love tank that won't fill up. Your energy, instead of being consciously used for constructive purposes, flows out of it.
As an experiment, try noting all the negative thoughts and bad feelings you verbalize throughout the day. You will be amazed at how often this happens. But the “voiced” resistance is just the tip of the iceberg.
Negative statements reflect the true essence of resistance. Our true task is to heal the spiritual experiences and sensations caused by it. Start by being aware of what you have said.
Be careful with words. As you gain confidence in building your life, you will see that what you say comes true. The power of your words is limitless. Especially if you express your true desires.

The resistance game

The resistance game can be fun. We sometimes play it with my twelve year old daughter Lauren. One day we go shopping together and just note all the negative statements of each other. Then we try to speak differently.
Here are a few examples of what we said: I said, "There probably isn't a good parking spot here, let's look somewhere else." I should have said, "Let's see if there's a good parking spot nearby." We then drove to where we wanted to park and found a parking spot.
She said, “I hope we don't have to wait long; I have so much homework." Then she corrected herself: “I hope we get through this quickly. I want to have enough time to do my homework.”
When it was time to leave the store, I said, "Your mom won't like it if we're late." Together we redid this phrase: "If we get home quickly, mom will be very happy." Near the house in the car, I said: "Don't forget to take the bag." In a positive version, it sounded: “We will now make sure that everyone has taken it.”

Stop resisting your partner

The same principles apply to interpersonal relationships. Don't focus on your partner's actions and emotions that seem negative to you. Focus on the behavior and reactions of the person that you like. For example, on wanting to hear from him what a wonderful person you are. Think of times when your partner gave you high marks. Feel like this: "I want him to love me and think I'm great." Instead of thinking, "He never helps me with anything." Remember how he once helped you, revive your feelings at that moment in your memory. Then express your desire to experience those emotions again and think, "I want my partner to help me." If we shift the emphasis in this way, ninety percent of the problems will find their solution. By identifying your positive desires, you awaken an inner belief in the possibility of obtaining what you want. When your faith is strong, the desired will begin to happen.
If you make wishes with an affirmative accent, then you contribute to their implementation.
When communicating with people, try to address them in an affirmative way and avoid expressing dissatisfaction, criticizing and demanding. Try to get rid of such expressions as "no", "you must not", "you must", "you never...", "you always...", "why don't you...".
Try - at least as a game - to find a more positive way to express your desires.
Instead of "We never go anywhere," say, "Let's do something different this weekend." Instead of saying “You forgot to take out the trash again”, speak differently: “When was the last time you took out the trash? The bucket was full, so I carried it out myself.” If you are asking for more, don't verbally condemn, don't shame, don't blame. Everything will work out if you use a light tone: as if at the table, ask your partner to serve a butter dish. There is no need to doubt that he will hear you.
If you turn to your partner, believing that he is deaf, then he will not hear you.
If you resist some actions or moods, then at the moment when your partner is in a good mood, briefly and friendly ask him for what you want, and then patiently insist on it. On occasion, ask again, but each time as if you were doing it for the first time. After several requests, the partner will realize that he did not give you what you wanted; at the same time, he will be grateful that you do not shake his nerves. The latter circumstance will allow him to overcome his own negative emotions regarding you. Not only will he not reject you, but he will gain an additional incentive to do something else for you. The same approach applies to all areas of relationships: in the office, at school, and at home.

The power of memory

The memory of good things strengthens your confidence in the same way that negative experiences increase resistance to life. If I really want something to happen, then I remember the happy events of the past. When I decided to write this book and figured out how much time it would take me, I remembered all the cases when I met the deadline with the work. I also recalled the satisfaction with which I had worked before, how wonderfully everything worked out for me. I drew from memory all the positive reviews about my work and gratitude. All this strengthened my faith that I could do this again. And I did!