10 signs that you are a real man. Psychology: Signs of a real man. How much should a normal man earn

When it comes to women, no one has a question: are they real? Usually they look for the ideal among them.

The stronger sex was unlucky in this regard: give everyone only one hundred percent man. So for happiness, it’s not enough to be born a boy, you still need to become a real man.

A real man. Who is he

The length of the list and the order of the physical, moral and intellectual virtues of a real man depend on the claims of a particular woman.

And yet it is interesting to make an average portrait of a dream man. How else, besides strength and mind, should He differ from his fellows?

Signs of an ideal

There are several sure signs pointing to that same man:

• neat and tidy;
• does not scatter words;
• honest;
• polite;
• looks at life optimistically.

His character

It is necessary to highlight those traits of a male character that are the basis, the core of the formation of an ideal guy.

If they develop, then everything else will “grow”:

His behavior

There is a code of conduct at home, with friends and at work for those who consider themselves a real man.

• If a friend or loved one is in trouble and asks for help, you need to do everything you can within the law.
• To hit in a fight in the groin is allowed only with a threat to life.
• When asked by a friend's wife, the best answer is "I don't know."
• The friend's wife is not a woman.
• Never cheat on children. If you promise, then fulfill.
• The husbands of the wife's girlfriends can be ignored.
• Do not promise to marry if you only need sex. In relation to a woman, this is meanness.
• AT conflict situation at work, a man resolves issues with the administration without entering into an argument with anyone.
• Behind the wheel, the main rule becomes "three D": give the way to the fool.
• If the thing taken for temporary use turned out to be faulty, it should be repaired or replaced with a new one.
• Do not listen to other people's secrets from a drunk friend.

The image is deceiving

The image of a real man is a stereotype of perception of his external qualities, an ideal gentleman's set, which, unfortunately, does not guarantee the same impeccable internal content.

So, what does the representative of the stronger sex look like from the outside, claiming the title of " a real man and what might be behind it:

• behind the proud posture and inflexible gaze - an indifferent cracker;
• behind expensive clothes and a presentable appearance - an arrogant snob;
• behind the ease and naturalness of behavior - a dissolute type;
• for courtesy in dealing with women - henpecked and ladies' man;
• behind the immersion in work - a weakling, unsure of his abilities;
• behind significance and popularity - an ambitious, but unprincipled person.

Of course, you need to know what qualities the standard of the stronger sex has and how it should look from the outside, but it’s worth it, as they say, to mature at the root. In addition, the stronger sex, despite the innate courage, often experiences fears.

What are men afraid of?

Men's fears are, first of all, the fear of losing freedom, which means for many of them to lose their face, unwillingness to become dependent on people and circumstances.

Psychologists call the most male fears:

• fear of responsibility. And not because he doesn’t want to, but because he always doubts whether he can handle it himself or whether this is the person for whom he stands;
• fear of interference in his inner world. Unwillingness to dissolve in any kind of relationship: he himself must make decisions and be independent in them;
• fear of losing freedom. By nature, men are polygamous, and should be eternal hunters (only for whom?);
• fear of repeating negative experiences personal and parental;
• fear of female manipulation(tears, pregnancy);
• fear of relationship with mother-in-law. As a rule, these are those whose family was dominated by a mother who dreams of raising her son to be a real man.

So, inner fears can interfere with the manifestation best qualities, but do not get hung up on them, it is better to pay attention to the life credo of an ideal man.

Integrity doesn't hurt

His psychology should be based on a life outlook, that is, on what is important to him in the first place, and what he will never do.

There cannot be many principles, four are enough:

1. Always reject inaction;
2. Always take responsibility;
3. Always lead;
4. Always know why it is being done.

Affirmative “always” can be replaced with negative “never”, but in any case, in the life arsenal of men there should be such mottos, which necessarily change over time, but which cannot be deviated from.

rules

Compliance with the elementary rules of etiquette and the ability to communicate increase the chance of any man to pass for real.

There are many other unofficial rules for the behavior of a real man, for example, that he does not walk under an umbrella with another man, does not dress like a club boy, does not position his superiority in front of anyone, does not drink cocktails and does not watch melodramas.

The characterization of the ideal in the flesh will not be complete if its duty is not remembered.

Responsibilities

Any man is obliged to respect the law and defend the Motherland. The popular saying about him about the house, the tree and the son did not appear by chance, it indicates that he must create, live for others, protect loved ones, and in moments of danger overshadow him.

A man's duty is to respect himself and count on the respect of others. This is exactly what is needed for the head of the team and the head of the family. He must be able to subordinate himself to his values ​​and be able to subordinate others.

Main qualities

Considering attractive and weak sides the stronger sex, the rules of behavior for men and how to recognize the real in them, it's time to determine its main qualities.

Physical strength

It is desirable for a man, but not as obligatory as fortitude. Still, playing sports never hurts, especially for those who do not feel confident in themselves to protect their family.

martial arts, gym- all this will contribute to the accumulation of physical strength, and hence the firmness of the spirit will become stronger.

Ease of lifting

This quality depends on the ability to quickly make decisions and correctly assess the situation. His style of life should be such that, if necessary, he was ready to change everything in one minute or start all over again.

Clarity of goals

Where to go, why to go and with whom to go - a real man always knows. The dream of an uncertain bright future is not for him.

He moves from step to step up the ladder, if not career, then material well-being for sure.

Responsibility

A real man feels responsible for himself, for his family, and for his homeland (no less). There is no need to ask where to find one, because if you trust a man, obey him, he will definitely become like that.

Accuracy

Not every woman has this quality, so a man who has the ability to maintain order in things around him, in his thoughts and actions, cannot but be an ideal.

Where to meet a neat man? Raise him!

How to raise a son

Only a man can grow a real man out of a boy. He should be an example for his son. There is no father, so there must be his image. It was women's upbringing that gave rise to the myth that normal men had died out in the world.

Of course, they exist, only mother's cares disguised them, and there are no women nearby who can awaken the masculine principle in them - more and more the same "mommies".

Thousands of tips for raising boys. It is easier to remember what is strictly forbidden to do:

• Do not interrupt the child's initiative. Do not scold for her, do not punish - just explain.
• Don't pamper.
• Do not educate according to any one method.

And the most important thing to do always is to love your son and share with him all your worries and troubles. Let him care for you, love you and protect you.

Looking for a real man, like perfect woman will never end, because there is no limit to perfection.

Video: What should be a man

📌 Signs of a real strong man

Today I propose to talk in great detail about strong men, as always truthfully. Take off the rose-colored glasses and forever get rid of the illusions about the "strong man", about his "shoulder", about the "stone wall". To be with such a man, you need to be a 100% woman, with not relative, but certain feminine qualities.

So that all these romantic fantasies later do not turn into an eternal struggle with a strong man for the right to take precedence, I propose to understand in detail:

Who is a strong man?
What qualities does he have?
And what is it like to live with a strong man?

A strong man is the leader and head of the family. If you want to be close to such a man, then the conversation about democracy in the family is closed. Not everyone can be held responsible. She is carried alone and in this case is a strong man. He also determines in which direction the family moves. The myth that it is possible to make joint decisions was invented strong women. If a woman says “we make decisions together”, then only she is in the family and makes decisions. Always one accepts and the other agrees. Everything else is empty talk.

He makes independent decisions and is responsible for them. This is what all women dream of - to remove the burden of responsibility that crushes and destroys the female psyche. We dream, but how to give up control, how to let a man make decisions?

A strong man is ready to discuss his decision with a woman only in order to win her over to his side. And a woman who wants to be with a strong man respects his right to make decisions and be responsible for them. Responsibility makes a man stronger, and responsibility destroys a woman. And now let's remember the song of a strong woman: - I'm losing myself, I'm losing my individuality, I'm not a slave, etc. But in fact, a woman loses control, her strength and her armor. It's scary when there's war, but now it's peacetime.

He is ambitious and a career takes an important place in the life of a strong man. In part, this is the meaning of his life. This means that he devotes a lot of time to work, career and success. Any man should take place in the profession that he chooses. Without this, it is difficult for him to feel like a man. A woman can only have respect for the work that her husband is busy with. We are talking about the jealousy and grief of a woman, that a man pays little attention to her and does not go to children.

"Better to have ten percent of a 100 percent man than one hundred percent of a ten percent man." H. Andelin.

He is able to provide for his family, thinks like a breadwinner. He earns, and the woman has the opportunity not to work, but to take care of the house and family. She doesn't need anything. Yes, secretly every woman dreams about it. But how to "plant" yourself at home, to depend on it, what to do with your fear?

After all, many strong men subsequently insist that the woman does not work. A strong man does not need a woman who is engaged from morning to evening in her self-realization, he needs loving wife, which has the strength and desire to deal with the notorious rear. He needs the energy of a woman, which she will spend on him and on their common life, and not on self-realization.

Even if you have a housewife who can help you, the house needs female attention and energy. Without a woman, the house is empty, and sometimes neglected, there is no warmth and comfort in it. The most important thing is the ability of a woman to hold energetically what a man will bring, what he will be able to earn.

And when is she busy with her realization? Why is she a strong man? Yes, a woman can do something, but if she chooses a career and puts it in the first place, nothing will come of it. A woman can only make a career alone or with a weak man. If a woman is independent, makes career plans and is realized, this is very hurtful for a man. Do you know why? Because he does not understand why he is needed then? A strong man cares little about a woman's career, he is interested in femininity and female energy.

He has clear principles and views on which he builds his life. He follows them and rarely violates them, even in the name of love and the preservation of relationships. Women often mistake for love the opportunity to give in to men. They are always checking how far a man can go in violation of his principles.

If he yields, then she herself does not respect him, and then she hopes to meet a stronger one. And if he does not yield, then a strong woman shouts that he is a despot. And a wise woman subtly feels that if a man is able to give up his views in the name of her whims, then what are these principles? His decisions are not discussed. Because for any decision you need to answer. And responsibility is a purely masculine quality. And the woman does not need it. Therefore, it easily yields and adjusts. But these are purely feminine qualities.

A man conducts all calculations with money in the family. The principle of "earn and give to me" was invented by strong women. A woman should not count money, worry about debit and credit, well, only if she does not want to become a financier in the family. A woman who counts money and is responsible for all the finances in the family loses her charm and femininity. “Women are not meant to worry about money. This burden leads to depression, women lose vivacity and charm, and sometimes bring themselves to mental and physical illness. H. Andelin.

He is engaged in the upbringing of children, especially boys. His word for children is law. The boy learns masculinity, strength and will from his father, and the girl grows in respect for a man. It will not be difficult for such a woman to build relationships in a couple later.

He knows what he wants in life, so he is firm, decisive, self-confident. Rarely need advice. Because any advice makes a man weaker, especially women. Even if he makes a mistake, he will correct it.

You need to understand that only a woman who unconditionally agrees with female nature can be with a strong man. Behind a stone wall, she is ready to leave her strength, independence, independence and leadership qualities. She is ready to become weak and dependent. No one is asking you to give up the power of your soul, but the neurotic power dictated by fears will have to be given up. A man needs a woman who is confident in her feminine charm, in her feminine Nature.

And dependence on a man is not a prison or slavery. This is an understanding that the feminine nature is so arranged. And a woman needs protection, and women's happiness and well-being depend on a man.

Harmony is possible when two opposite energies, two opposite poles, are connected. And this harmony does not come from nowhere. Like, let it become stronger, and we will be happy. Does a strong man need a stubborn, domineering, strong-willed and demanding woman?

As long as you are such a woman, the hope for a strong partner will remain unrealizable. And remember that in an alliance with a strong man, a woman does not lose freedom, not individuality and not herself, she loses control and the ability to defend herself on her own.

So now the question, think carefully before answering. Do you choose a strong man behind whom is like “behind a stone wall” or are you closer to your principles, the ability to make all decisions, protect yourself and provide for? It's time to make a choice.

And remember, any man is a potential leader and strong, he is so conceived by Nature. You just need to become weak and feminine.

This article was automatically added from the community

Many often operate with the term "real man", not really realizing it. In the minds of women mythical creature, which knows everything, knows how, has the appearance of Til Schweiger and the endurance of a “hard nut”, and surpasses all James Bonds in intelligence and seriousness. Fights like Steven Seagal and dances like Patrick Swayze. His image is very contradictory, if we refer to the words of the ladies themselves. Men wonder: what is he, and what should be his behavior? We examined several basic qualities of a real man in relation to a woman.

self esteem

It is hardly worth expecting respect from a man who does not respect himself. Self-respect can manifest itself in different things: in the unwillingness to exchange for trifles, to quarrel in lines, to get involved in stupid arguments and stupidly risk life and health. Anyone who respects himself is usually not content with little and takes everything from life, only the most necessary.

Kind heart

No matter how women sigh, looking at movie villains, in their hearts they dream that under the brutal image of a man there is a gentle romantic, ready to pick a kitten from a tree. Worthy men do not know the word "aggression", and they show composure only in dangerous situations, when it is necessary to urgently make a sound, balanced decision. Kindness is not so much a masculine quality as it is obligatory for all mankind. This concept includes the readiness of a man to help his neighbor, and love for children, and the ability to forgive. It is hardly worth waiting for something good from a vindictive and malevolent man who rejoices in other people's failures.

self control

Susceptibility to temptations is a natural state modern man, and it is impossible to avoid it even by going to a monastery. And the character of a person determines precisely his ability to resist temptation, and not to run away from it. Words such as “weakness”, “addiction” are clearly not about a real man.

Education and courtesy

It is not necessary to know the etiquette of Victorian England to be considered a pleasant and polite person. In relation to a woman, you can always determine what this type is “made of”.

Sometimes men think that you need to be gallant only with the woman you "have views of." The rest, if it's just a friendly date, will conduct themselves, pay for themselves, protect themselves, help themselves. This should be a warning, because such a self-serving approach of “minimizing effort” and “polite only with a select few” is clearly not the kind of behavior worthy of praise. Sooner or later, it becomes clear to a woman that they are just having a good time with her, and no one likes to think that they do not deserve good relationship only because they are not seen as life partners.
Even if you are lucky and you are that “chosen one”, think about whether you like the fact that your young man is rude and bickering; even with everyone but you?

Strength of will and spirit

Always complaining guys are a nightmare for any woman. Of course, everyone has the right to express their emotions and dissatisfaction with circumstances, but sooner or later thoughts must turn into actions, and the situation will have to be corrected on their own. This behavior speaks volumes. If a man desperately puts off the moment of solving the problem and does not do everything that depends on him, you should think: in a serious relationship, his problems will become yours, and your gentleman will be too busy with himself to help you in difficult times.

Responsibility

The ability to direct energy into action, and words into life is one of the most important qualities that are valued in a strong field. It is always important to listen: does a man keep his promises, does he keep his word? If his phrases about help diverge from deeds and remain just words, this is another wake-up call: in the future, such a man will have to be constantly pushed to action; while a properly educated person does not even have to remind anything.

It is always important to be attentive and not to miss significant trifles. If you do not feel safe and secure, you should think about the future. However, if a man remembers important dates for you, is attentive to your condition, is always ready to help and take all measures in order to improve the situation - do not miss such a gentleman and reciprocate his kindness.

Do not look for your ideal in the movies and on the pages of magazines - perhaps the right man already there, but you don't notice it. Well, if that same real man reads our article, then we recommend that you read "" in order to be ready for anything.

Editorial Tips:
The way you meet a man depends largely on the family in which he lived and on himself. If you understand that your man is far from ideal, you can “launch” all your female power, which will help him achieve results. Remember, a woman has that energy and that wisdom that will allow a man to become a real protector, caring and loving. If your man is getting worse every year, ask yourself what you are doing wrong and if you are doing anything at all to allow a man to develop and achieve results. If you are unable to inspire your man, just do not interfere, do not cut. Just trust him and improve yourself. Soon you will be surprised how your man, his actions and decisions will be transformed. Behind every great man is an equally great woman. Get better, and your man will pull himself up and surprise you, and if not, someone will come who can do it.

Today we will tell you on what grounds you can distinguish a man who is also looking for his love from a man who is not interested in serious relationship.

Sign one: calls by name

No matter how strange it may sound, but the fact that a man at the beginning of a relationship calls you by name is the first sign that he is serious.

The thing is that men who often change women begin to confuse names. To get out, start using affectionate nicknames like a baby or a fish.

Sign two: no cheating

Remember that a real man who loves you will not cheat. Of course, not always a woman knows that a man began to cheat on her. But most often this can be traced by changes in his behavior.

At the beginning of a relationship, there may not be cheating, but there may be clearer signs. So if your partner is constantly staring at other young ladies, or even more so comparing you with them, run away from him. After all, such a man will bring you only tears and disappointments.

Sign three: I'm crying myself!

A man is not obliged to pay for you if it was you who invited him to a restaurant. But if you are interested in him, and he wants to continue the relationship, then he will pay himself. Most often - because of the desire to show you his generosity and the fact that he is a real man.

Psychologists note that when a man comes to a restaurant with his girlfriend, he leaves more tips than if he comes with friends. But remember that you, in no case should require him to pay for you. Otherwise, he may perceive it as a desire to cash in on him.

Sign #4: Getting to Know Your Parents

Another sign of a man who is committed to a serious relationship is getting to know his parents. The first sign is his desire to introduce you to his family. This is how he shows you that you are dear to him.

But getting to know your parents is a sign that he is ready for a serious relationship. Of course, this does not mean that he will immediately marry you. But the proposal to live together can definitely sound.

Sign five: no assault

There are different situations in every person's life. In every relationship, a fight can happen. But the real loving man never raise his hand to a woman. And this is a fact. And about the saying: "He beats - it means he loves," forget forever.

Sign six: he is interested in your opinion

If the man next to you is really interested in a serious relationship, then he will be interested in your opinion on important issues. And this will concern not only the house or the relationship itself, but also other areas of his life.

After all, if a man loves you, then he trusts you. So he will ask for advice. But remember that giving advice is only worth it when a man asks for it. Otherwise, you may hurt his pride.

Finally, we would like to wish you all the same to find your soul mate. And we hope that our advice will help you find your piece of female happiness.

In short, I think a real man is a realized man. And the implementation implies that it has:

A) A CASE with a capital letter, which he is good at and which he likes;

B) PEOPLE (family, woman, children) whom he loves and for whom he is responsible.

And at the same time, both work and family are a joy to him. However, even if it is implemented in one thing, it is still successful. Especially if it is implemented exclusively from internal need not to prove anything to anyone.

A man can be married or single, unemployed, but a wonderful husband and father, or childless high professional. Another caveat: the main thing is not how much a man earns, but whether he can feed himself - if he is alone, and his wife and children - if he is a family man. Maybe? Then there are no questions.

It is important that there is love in his life, that he accepts himself as a man and, in principle, he likes his life. In general, a successful man is one who feels himself successful.

After the publication of " 10 rules of an accomplished woman" and the article "Girls, you yourself spoil men! The women rebelled and demanded from me at least some rules of an accomplished man. Like, “what is it all of us yes we? Women - this, women - that ... And what about the men? Let's not hide: sometimes the demands were categorical and even angry. Girls, don't fight!

If it seemed to someone that out of solidarity I was inclined to ignore male flaws, then this is not so. The column about the established woman was conceived by the Cosmoolitan website, and it is aimed at a female audience. For some reason, we didn’t think about the fact that it would be interesting for her to argue about the signs of male solvency.

REAL

Now for the points related to those that were published earlier for women, in order to be fair.

1. He relies only on himself.

It is interesting that, despite all the changes in the public consciousness, the traditional idea of ​​who a real man is remains almost unchanged. And for men, life, socially resonant success is still more important than for women.

For example, I am ready to accept a woman who lives at the expense of her father or husband, but a guy right from school should rely only on himself. For your own sake. In this regard, a request to the mothers of boys is to loosen the bridle and give their sons the opportunity to learn to be independent.

2. He is self-sufficient.

That is, he does not cling to either his mother, or women, or friends, and, in principle, does not consider other people as a way to solve his problems.

3. He is independent.

In fact, millions of men are directly dependent on both their mother and cigarettes, and most often also on vodka and drugs. And hello to parents again: the tendency to addictions (and at the same time to procrastination - that very unnailed shelf) is formed in childhood, mainly due to lack of support in the family. And especially in combination with distrust and total control.

4. He doesn't ask for help.

Naturally, a man can ask for help in extreme cases, but he cannot live, counting on someone's help all the time.

5. He doesn't compromise.

In the sense that he did not tolerate. He does not bend, does not adapt to people and situations, does not maintain relationships "for the sake of perspective", does not go to work that he hates, does not live with a woman whom he does not love and does not rush between his wife and mother, and does not allow himself to be manipulated by anyone. one of them.

6. He doesn't compare.

A man would be glad not to compare, but at the biological level it is arranged in such a way that he compares always and everywhere. However, a successful, self-confident man is able to control this process and knows that it is much more productive to compare himself with himself, but yesterday. Ask yourself: “What am I doing better, faster, higher, stronger today than yesterday and a year ago?” This gives real motivation for growth and a reason to praise yourself.

7. He accepts himself for who he is.

It is known that in our society it is customary to treat with respect those who are always dissatisfied with themselves and to whom any result seems unsatisfactory. And the contented, the so-called "resting on their laurels" are, as it were, lazy losers.

In general, such an attitude has the right to life, but I insist that it is masculine to treat your appearance, figure, size well. This is called acceptance, and it is much preferable to the constant grumbling on the topic: “maybe I should pump up?”; "Am I tall? Or am I still of average height?

The less a man loves and accepts himself, the less able he is to love others. There is also such a direct relationship: the less a man is confident in himself, the more he has claims to his woman.

8. He doesn't run after women.

I'm afraid to incur female wrath, but I'm sure that a strong man who has taken place should not, humiliating himself, run after a woman who rejects him. It destroys his personality. He is what is called “losing himself” and all this has a very indirect relation to love. Well, a woman does not give in to courtship, it’s immediately obvious - you don’t have to get her, find another!

9. He avoided the midlife crisis or survived it with the least loss.

10. He firmly knows that a woman is the same person, only better.

TIRED MACHO and its signs

Now a little about anti-male behavior, a model that in some families is presented as a model of a real man. This is such an eternally tired macho who, not having time to cross the threshold of the house, flops down on the sofa and turns on the telly. Not even because he was tired, but because when he is in the field of view of his family, he is in the form of a husband and breadwinner.

The pose is such that “everything is on me”, “I gave birth to you”, “I feed you all” and “I want respect, after all”! And here he is lying, clicking the remote control, the children and his wife came running, set the table and immediately ran away, because dad was tired, dad needed to rest and in general today is football, his favorite team is playing. “Yes, and bring beer!”

Such men are not interested in anything but certain sports and certain brands of cars. They do not go to theaters and museums, explaining this in a strange way: “I work!” But, according to statistics, 70% of visitors to cultural events are women who also work.

We simply admit that they are able to combine work and breadth of interests, and men do this with great difficulty. But if they do, then let them remember that the need for cultural impressions, the craving for new things, the ability to feel and understand music, painting, and at least anything other than gadgets is also a sign of male solvency.

“Turn on macho” by those who no longer have ways to assert themselves, to receive at least outward manifestations of respect in their address, “to feel like a man after all.” Usually a tired macho is also an underestimated genius. From the age of 10 to 39, he continuously showed promise, and then stopped giving anything. He is sure that through the fault of intriguers, a stupid boss, a bitch-wife, or all at once, nothing came of his brilliant career and now everyone around is to blame for his failures.

Anyone who has achieved something and asserts himself in other places behaves peacefully at home and is happy to give his time and emotions to his loved ones. His success and joy is to hug his wife, to have time to read a bedtime story to the children, to tell them that he loves them. Oddly enough, only the strongest can do it.

Here we must admit that successful and strong men in our country are just a minority. And now there are definitely fewer of them than strong and successful women. And this is some kind of vicious circle, because weak notorious fathers cannot raise successful mentally healthy sons.

STRICT FATHER and its consequences

It is weak, under-realized, obsessed with complexes fathers who behave harshly and cruelly with their sons. They demand that they fight, engage in "combat" sports - boxing, wrestling, football or hockey. And it’s good if the boy is ready and adapted for this, if he is eager to fight.

And if not? Then he is subjected to insults (“weakling”), cruel ridicule (“Maybe you should buy pink tights?”) And, to a heap, bitter statements like “I thought my man was growing” and “I am ashamed of you, you are not a man” .

It is not clear just what such cool fathers are counting on? The fact that after their words the child will immediately grow balls of steel, and he will become Ilya Muromets?

However, so are mothers. Especially when they raise boys alone. They have the illusion that their father can be replaced by their own severity, emotional "dryness", rigidity. About the consequences here.

I declare with all responsibility: you will not be able to raise a real man if you “press”, humiliate, and even more so flog your son. But you will grow up a cruel neurotic, with aggression and a huge resentment for life, which he will take out on everyone: on women, classmates, classmates, employees, fellow travelers on the train, and, in fact, on you.

His main emotion will be the thirst for satisfaction for his childhood humiliation and suffering. He will hate himself and "women", and be afraid of men.

By the way, what is called corporal punishment in Russia is defined all over the world as “physical violence” (a legal term) and is punished to the fullest extent of criminal law. In many countries, what is possible and what is not in relation to one's own children is also regulated at the level of the Law. And I think it's right.

In our country, against the background of general aggressiveness, society also persistently imposes on children its idea of ​​who a “real man” is. Boys are told the same thing: “Don’t be a girl”, “don’t act like a woman”, “give in, you’re a boy”, “this is not masculine behavior” ... And the most controversial of the attitudes is “men don’t cry”.

Having the opportunity to repeatedly observe the consequences of such an approach, I can say that it affects the psyche of the child in the most negative way. The boy is told that men do not cry, but he wants to cry, he feels weak and defenseless, heavy emotions accumulate, finding no way out.

Parents who express active disapproval of the child's tears are no longer his friends, but those people who cannot be shown their true feelings, their face. And the boy learns forever that if he shows weakness, he will not be understood and supported. And hello bouquet of complexes led by an inferiority complex!

The child should have the right and the opportunity to throw out their emotions, experience suffering and only after that accept the situation and deal with it. By the way, adults, strong men, may well shed a tear if something touched them. And that doesn't make them women.

ONLY LOVE and its consequences

All women dream of a strong, kind, understanding man. I'll tell you how it turns out.

A successful man is formed even before conception. His parents love each other, are happy and waiting for his appearance. Further more.

If a boy is supported at home, treated warmly and with understanding, then a man will grow out of him who knows how to support and understand a woman.

If a boy is accepted as he is, regardless of his physical and mental abilities - they don’t press, they don’t load with expectations and requirements, he will grow out of a man who loves a woman, UNCONDITIONALLY, and God forbid - one for life.

If the boy is respected, negotiated with, his choices and desires are taken into account, a confident adult man with high self-esteem, self-acceptance and the very minimum of cute complexes grows out of him.

If the parents were in a difficult conflict relationship, did not pay attention to the boy, kept shouting, blaming each other for all sins, he will behave the same way in his relationship. (If childhood was very difficult - he was beaten, left for days with neighbors, or even sent to an orphanage, then growing up, he does not want a family or children at all).

If the parents behave responsibly towards the boy, he will behave the same towards the woman. Etc. Children generally develop only by analogy, not following the rules that you declare, but adopting your way of behavior.

Therefore, dear fathers of boys! Remember that even if you do not live with your son's mother, you are the main example for him. And when you communicate with your son's mother, please do not pour old grievances on her, do not show disrespect, and even more so aggression. Thus, you practically do not leave your son a chance for a happy harmonious relationship with the opposite sex.

And so, dear mothers of boys! Be attentive to your sons, do not be afraid to show love and show other positive emotions. Spend time with him, talk to him, do not offend with distrust and coldness. How many times have I heard from adult men: "If I like a woman, I can't even talk to her." And why? Because as a child, he already approached his most beloved woman - his mother, and she sent him. Most likely even more than once. Read more here.

Well, the last.

Dear men! Whatever you are at the moment, you can always become better, kinder, more prosperous. And you will do a great favor to your family and especially children, if you make friends with your head, deal with your complexes, childhood psychotraumas and psychoses.

Only in this way will you be able to grow a man out of your son - healthy, happy, real.